My Ugly Addiction is Uglier than Yours

Well, actually I don't know that for certain.
But I've realized that I have a terrible, terrible propensity to sacrifice what is good for the sake of pleasing others.
Imagine that. Me, trying so hard to please others. This has been the deepest, darkest struggle of mine since I can remember. I still find myself trying so hard to validate myself through pleasing others.
Sometimes I really don't even know why I do it anymore because it doesn't make me happy.
It started as something harmless and juvenile--when I was younger, people made fun of me, excluded me. I was "the good kid" who never got the innuendos or memos. Whatever ounce of approval I could find from someone, I clung to it passionately. I was passive. Even when I was assertive(which was rare), it wasn't even because of my own convictions nearly so much as my fear of being rejected by people who might have been disappointed if I were not assertive.

To this day, I still groan over this weakness. It is far more crippling to me than anything else. It keeps me from being pleasing to God(because I'm too concerned with other, far less important matters). It keeps me from being the leader that my wife desires me to be, the leader that she has expressed her desire for me to be. It keeps me from making solid decisions. It keeps me from saving money. It keeps me from doing my spiritual work to its fullest extent.
I want so badly for you to always be satisfied with me, for you to never have a negative thing to say or a jest to point at me, I literally tear myself apart over it. I daily sterilize myself and guard myself, defend myself from every possible failure, even if it means never doing anything of consequence.

Congratulations. You have just met the real Andy Good.
What do I do? Where do I start?
I don't even know how to even begin battling this problem. I feel bound.